Chapter Content
Alright, so let's talk about, you know, getting a handle on all the stuff you're committed to. It really boils down to learning how to say "no." It sounds simple, right? But it's, like, super important for actually controlling your time.
There's this thing, it's called the "Yes-Damn Effect." Basically, the idea is that we humans, we're not so great at predicting how much free time we'll *actually* have later on. So, we end up saying "yes" to all sorts of things, thinking we'll totally have the time for it, but then, uh oh, the future arrives, and we're like, "Damn! I'm way too busy!" So, yeah, you say "yes" now, and then later, it's just, "Damn!"
So, how do we fix that? Well, we need to master what I'm calling the "Art of No." I mean, seriously.
I’ve got two, like, quick little tests you can use, okay? One's for personal stuff, and the other is for work stuff. Pretty simple.
For personal commitments, I want you to use the "Right Now" test. So, when you're trying to figure out if you should do something – someone asks you to help them move or go to, I don't know, some event – ask yourself, "Would I do this *right now*?" Like, today? Or, you know, maybe tomorrow? The point is to bring it into the present. We're trying to get rid of that future time distortion thing, that "Yes-Damn" thing we were just talking about. By thinking about it as if it was happening *now*, you can make a much more, like, clear-headed decision. So, if the answer to, "Would I do this right now?" is "no," then just say "no." Seriously. Just do it. If the answer is "yes," then, sure, go for it.
Now, for professional commitments, you use the "New Opportunity" test. This one's got a couple of steps.
First, remember those lists you made earlier, you know, your priority professional items? Does this new opportunity *fit* with those? Is it actually one of your priorities? If it's not, easy, just say "no." If it *is* a priority, then, okay, move on to step two.
Step two: Is this a "Hell yeah!" opportunity? I mean, is it something you're *really* excited about? There’s this writer, Derek Sivers, he has this rule: if it's not a "Hell yeah!" then it's a "no." I like that a lot. So, if it is a "Hell yeah!", great, go to step three.
And step three is all about reality, right? Assume this opportunity is going to take *twice* as long as you think it will, and that it's only going to be *half* as rewarding. Would you still want to do it then? Humans, we tend to be super optimistic when we're starting something new. So, we need to, like, force ourselves to be a bit more realistic, by, like, lowering our expectations a little. So, if, after thinking about that, the answer's "no," then just say "no." But if the answer is still "yes," even with all those downsides, then, yeah, go ahead.
So, yeah, those are the two shortcuts: the "Right Now" test and the "New Opportunity" test. Use them, master the Art of No, and you'll start to actually, like, take back control of your time. It's pretty great.