Chapter Content
Okay, so, let's talk about something that's been on my mind a lot lately, and I think it resonates with, well, pretty much everyone, especially if you're a parent. It's this whole idea of, you know, how quickly time just slips through your fingers.
There was this guy, Greg Sloan, right? He was like, super successful, working at Goldman Sachs, a vice president and, you know, doing really well. He had all the things, like, the money, the respect, the fancy clients. He was on track for everything he'd ever wanted. But then something happened that kind of, well, woke him up, I guess.
His son, who was, I think, five at the time, his preschool was having this "Doughnuts with Dad" thing. Greg couldn’t make it 'cause he was on a business trip. His wife told their son, and the kid just shrugged and said something like, "That's okay, Dad's never around anyway." Ouch, right? I mean, that had to sting.
Apparently, that was it for Greg. The story goes he quit his job later that year. And you know what? He said he had no regrets. Now, that's powerful.
It brings up this whole point about what I think of as the "magic years" with your kids. It's like, for about ten years, you're their absolute favorite person in the whole world, you know? After that, they have other people – friends, partners, their own kids eventually. But for those ten years, you’re like, *everything* to them. It's when you build that foundation for your relationship with them. And here's the thing: By the time they’re eighteen, you’ve already used up most of the time you’re ever going to have with them. Isn’t that crazy to think about?
And it's even harder because those early years for your kids often line up with when you’re, you know, hitting your stride professionally. It's like late nights at the office, all those meetings, emails during dinner, calls on the weekends… It can all just become a blur. There was this post I saw somewhere online, and it said something like, "Twenty years from now, the only people who will remember you worked late are your kids." That really hits home, doesn’t it?
Now, I’m kind of torn on this, to be honest. On the one hand, being there, spending time with your loved ones, that's gotta be the most important thing, right? Like, at the end of the day. But on the other hand, there’s something to be said for your kids seeing you work hard on something you’re passionate about. It teaches them something. It sets an example.
So, how do you balance that? I think the key is to not completely sacrifice your career or your goals in order to be constantly present. You know, you don’t want to stop learning or growing. The goal is to have the clarity to choose, to define your own balance. It's about asking yourself the tough questions and figuring out what's right for *you*, instead of just blindly accepting what someone else tells you is the “right” answer. You gotta realize those ten short years are different. It might not be the time to go for that big promotion. Or if it is, you need to understand the trade-offs you're making.
Greg Sloan, that Goldman Sachs guy, he made his choice. He left his job so he could coach his son's baseball teams and be involved in his life. He said it saved his marriage, too! That ability to choose is a privilege, no doubt. But if you have it, don't waste it. Don’t just fall into the default path.
I think about my own dad a lot in this context. He was amazing at balancing work and family. He’d come home for dinner, play catch with me, and then work late after I went to bed. Seeing him work hard taught me so much about discipline and work ethic. And he always explained *why* he was working hard. He included me in his journey. He took me on work trips, which I understand now was a way to make the time count. That kind of thing makes a huge difference. An absence because of work is more understandable if you know the context.
So, yeah, the magic years are a call to arms. Wrestle with this tension, be there, and appreciate that short window of time you have. Don't live the deferred-happiness plan, thinking, "I'll just work really hard now, and then I'll be happy and spend time with my kids when I'm sixty." Because when you're sixty, they won't be little kids anymore. Those magic years will just fade away if you let them.
Reject the defaults, ask the questions, embrace the tension, and design a balance that fits *your* world. Because, well, the days are long, but the years are short, you know? Really short.