Chapter Content
Okay, so, um, let's talk about something a little heavy, but really important. You know, it's about time. And not just, like, what time is it, but how we're spending it, especially with the people we love.
There's this... this quote, “Enjoy yourself, enjoy yourself, it’s later than you think.” Really sticks with you, right?
I heard this story about a woman, Alexis. She was living in Houston, had three sons, and she just had this feeling, this understanding that time with them was... precious, fleeting, you know? She used to say, even when they were little, that you really only get them for like, twelve, thirteen years, if you're lucky. After that, it's, uh, well, chauffeur, taxi, hotel kind of thing. Just providing the basics, a place to sleep, food, rides to their stuff.
And that awareness, that feeling, made her really try to, you know, grab every moment. She surprised her sons with a ski trip one spring break. She called it the "trip of a lifetime," made tons of memories, she said. And then, even though her middle son was, like, “too old” for birthday parties, she threw him one anyway. Cake, presents, the whole thing. They celebrated him.
Everything was good. For a while, anyway.
Then... then tragedy struck. Her middle son, Jackson, he was killed in a motorcycle accident. Just after his twentieth birthday. Can you imagine?
I got an email telling me this story, and it just... it stopped me cold. I mean, I'm a new dad, and I can’t even fathom that kind of loss. Alexis sent me photos of her boys, and she was pointing out how happy Jackson was as a kid. Never lost that spark, she said. And she told me, "Always remember, everyone we love, they are on loan to us for a short period of time. They are gone in the blink of an eye.”
Wow, that hits home, doesn’t it?
So, there's this survey, the American Time Use Survey. Basically, it tracks how people spend their time. And when I saw the data... man, it really got to me. My son was just six months old at the time, and becoming a parent just... changed everything. My whole perspective on time. From being clueless, to like, nervously aware of how quickly it was all going by.
You start tracking their age in weeks and months, you know? And that just highlights all the time you’re *not* getting back.
The data showed me this harsh reality. How quickly time fades. How these chapters of your life close, never to be reopened. There are these windows, these periods of time where certain people are really present in your life. Maybe it's just one more summer with your siblings, a couple more trips with your old friends, a few more years with a wise family member, a handful more conversations with a coworker you really enjoy, or a single last walk with your parents. And if you don't really *see* those windows, they disappear. Just like that.
The data basically boiled down to these points, you know? Time with your family, with your parents and siblings, it peaks when you're a kid. Then it drops off as you get older and get caught up in your own stuff.
Time with your kids? Peak in their early years and then plummets. There's this really short window where you’re their whole world. Don't miss it.
Time with friends? Peaks at eighteen, then fades. You have a bunch of friends when you're young, then a smaller group of close friends when you're older. Embrace the wide circle when you can, and value the depth of those important friendships as you grow.
Time with your partner, that tends to go up until, well, the end. So choose wisely, you know? That person is going to have a huge impact on your life.
Time with coworkers? Consistent during working years, then drops off after you retire. So, if you can, find work you enjoy, with people you like, people who give you energy.
And finally, time alone. It just increases as you get older. We tend to fear it when we're young, that feeling of not fitting in. But you need to learn to enjoy it. Find joy in the time you have to yourself.
So, to summarize. Family time is finite. Cherish it. Children time is precious. Be present. Friend time is limited. Prioritize the real ones. Partner time is meaningful. Never settle. Coworker time is significant. Find energy. Alone time is abundant. Love yourself.
It doesn't matter where you're from, how old you are, if you're rich or poor. Time is the one thing we all share. We all struggle with.
There's this article that talks about how, even if you're not near the *end* of your life, you might be near the end of your time with some of the *most important* people in your life.
Someone once said, "No matter how many times you do something, there will come a day when you do it for the last time.”
There will be a last bedtime story, a last walk with a sibling, a last hug with your parents at a family gathering, a last phone call from a friend asking for support.
How many moments do you *really* have left with the people you love? It's probably fewer than you think. All those little moments we take for granted, we'll eventually wish we had more of them.
So, it's about using the knowledge of time's passing to take action. To focus on what really matters. To control your time. How you spend it, where you spend it, and who you spend it with.
Alexis, the woman I mentioned before, she understood all this, even before the tragedy. And she once said something that really stuck with me. She said, "I once saw a challenge that said, 'It's your time to shine! You've got the stage, ten thousand people are waiting for you to walk out, you get one sentence. What do you say?' My answer was and still is 'It's later than you think.' "
So yeah, we end where we started. “Enjoy yourself, enjoy yourself, it’s later than you think.” Think about it.